Today's Special

Since the truly shocking and untimely passing of Cory Monteith (the total cutie from Glee who wowed me with his guts to carry on dancing the way he did) his on-and-off girlfriend and his on-and-on screen co-star, Lea Michelle, has had a lot to deal with. She is reported as seeking solace in some old-school therapy that has stood the test of time and helped heal many a broken heart. 

Recent Hollywood snapshots reveal Lea Michelle sporting a blonde mane and fuller cheeks. Definitely fuller.

"She is dealing with a lot right now and this treatment is definitely helping her cope" said Ben N. Jerry - her family friend and long-time therapist.

Well, the picture is more than telling of just how much her coping method has helped her. I don't know about her anguished soul, but am pretty damn sure that this treatment will help her never break her bones, ever, courtesy the cushioning effect of all that.. well.. cushioning.
"She's going to bounce back, strongly" quipped Dr. Jerry.

Congratulations. Your troll-fest ends here. Lea Michelle?! The girl in the picture is Rebel Wilson. Australian funny girl who loves to tickle those ribs.

Reader (gasping to self): "Shit isn't that Lea Michelle? Fuck, it's not?? I swear I thought it was her for a second. Poop. Trolled."

 Seriously though? You didn't even call this bluff when I said Dr. "Ben N Jerry"? Pfft!

Moral of the Story: The world wide web is gaining infamy for trolling innocent netizens... I hope you have the strength and courage to get through it when it comes to getcha. Amen. 

* * *

Dear Readers, 

I'm in the middle of overhauling my blog.
Patience, oodles of support and comments needed.

What's exams got to do with it?

Everything.



My end semester exams start on October 12th
*faints*

-Rewind to a few days back-

Me: (beaming) I've done really well in the tests! :D
Dad: (from behind the newspaper) Of course you did, you are older than everybody else in class.
Me: Er... hello? I really did well...
Dad: (in some kinda trance) You had better get a distinction. All your cousins have completed graduation! No excuses! Top the college! I want to see a gold medal!
Me: Hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahha!
Haha. It's B.A. I'm doing. They wont give me a gold medal even if I take the exam under the fricking ocean and top the class.
Dad: (in total trance) Don't say that. Work hard. Have faith. You can do it. You Can Win. One Minute Manager. Who moved My Cheese? First, Break All The Rules. 7 Habits of Habits of Highly Effective People. (yes, I said total trance)
Me: Er... Bye dad.

* * *
Its 3 days, 85 hours and 5001 minutes for exam to start and I have questions:

Why does my best friend decide to buy that dark, gloomy cloud and hang it right over my head?
Why must the cutest boy in town message me all the time when I have 5 full units to study?
Why does my dad suddenly decide to "let's have a drink tonight, beta?"
Free fucking whiskey- like I'll ever refuse.
Why is my blow-job of a neighbor bursting crackers all day- at regular intervals of time?
Motherfucker, it ain't diwali yet and I'm really trying to study.
And why does my other neighbor suddenly want to drill a zillion holes in his wall?!
If he goes on for one more day, I swear he'll be the first of our species to have two assholes.
Why did my sister bring the world's-most-amazing-movie-collection home?
How can I fall asleep while studying, 6 times in a row?
How the fuck can I still be watching TV & eating potato chips all day?
Who replaced my appetite with a whale's?!

Synopsis:
Exams- they're here.
I have just 2 million distractions to battle.
I just cant stop eating for fuck's sake.
Calorie intake surpasses actual requirement by light years.
Seratonin OD. I cant even stay awake long enough to figure out "functions of the hippocampus"
Exams- they're here.
*dies*